「愛過了，就算老死不相認，也不後悔」

- Tammy Ho.

消失。

天不長地不久。

有一天，回到吳哥窟，我也要找一面巨牆，找一個石洞，把心裡的事情，關於你的事情，如此這般，由始至結，一一細訴。然後，把你的目光，你的神色，你的氣味留下來，用泥土畫上句號來埋葬。然後，或許新長的樹木會帶有你的目光，你的神色，你的氣味。

我們之間的年年月月，在千年的頹垣敗瓦之中，不過渺然如塵土罷。

在花樣年華裡，周慕雲他始終沒再遇上蘇麗珍。 王家衛拍了另一個結局，那是活在另一個時空裡，不存在的結局。回頭路窄，如此相見，不如永不相見。

你說有些事情，不如不說。

我明白。你害怕有些事情，脫了韁，便一發不可收拾。才像蘇麗珍一樣欲去還留。而周慕雲，難道他一直以來不過一廂情願嗎？

他萬水千山跑到吳哥窟，是因為在萬變的世間，唯有那個永恆的，遙遠的，孤獨的地方，可以讓感情的死亡，繼續不朽。這樣說也許不對。終止的是一段關係，感情，卻是雖死猶生的。人生最痛苦，莫過於此。

這些，你了解嗎，你體諒嗎。

never let me go.

The smell on you brings me back to where I was, and sadly reminds me of where I am. I wish the roads would keep us wandering. I wish I could find the right words to say before your gaze became too intimidating. And I wish you knew that when we said goodbye, I did not want to. I remained where I was for a long time, praying that you would turn around and find me still there at the stairs. I will remember the dark eyes of yours and the contour of your face under the shades at night, as it becomes part of the melancholic collection of my memories of you.

officially 25 !

19 December - a bright, sunny day

I have a few things to say for my birthday (what's good about birthday is that you get the turn to stand in the spotlight, so bear with me for the moment, for once a year in my life :)).

It's my 25th birthday, which marks a full quarter of a century.

To my friends, I have to thank you all for your kindness, for being with me when I'm most alone, and lending me a hand when I am most in need. I'm grateful to those who read my writings and are interested in my little thoughts. I'm grateful to those who have spent the good times with me and survived the bad times with me, and have been tolerant of my faults. You may think what a cheerful and hopeful person I'm, but it's the people around me who have made me so. I was once a pathetic pessimist who believed in tragedies, but now everything is brightly lit because of the lights you have shed on me.

I also want to say that it doesn't matter we don't get to see one another a lot. It's your presence itself that matters the most. It's true that we spend our lives mostly on our own, but I spend a whole lot of time thinking about you and dreaming of the good times we had (and stalking your facebooks).

Life has done me good, and I can't be more thankful for everything I have, and everything I don't have. Honestly I don't have much to wish for. I'm contented about my life in its down-to-earth, comfortable state in which I could still afford the time to read, to write, to travel, and to do the things that please me. Of course, I still have in mind my pursuits and dreams, which keep my life going.

'I suppose the important thing is to make some sort of difference. You know, actually change something... Not the whole entire world. Just the little bits around you.' 

This is what Emma Morley said in One Day, who is my favourite heroine in my favourite English book of the year. She said it at the very beginning on the very first page, at her early twenties, and it pretty much tells you my belief about my work and my being myself. 

I believe being a teacher is about making a difference. Small as it may seem, but every greatness begins with the smallest things. And greatness is not measured in terms of the number of distinctions. My students get none, but I still think they're great. They have the kindest heart and sweetest temperament, if you could only know them in person. I've gone too far but I consider myself very lucky to have them as my students, and I see the difference I'm making in them, however trivial it may be.

What I want to say is, don't be hesitant to make a difference, whether it's in yourself, or in the people around you, because you are what you believe.

Resolution for my 25th birthday:
Be good to myself. Be as good to others.

Please be there with me when I turn 26!
:DD

By the way, you know what, tomorrow will be a bright, sunny day. Not that I've checked the weather forecast, but because 19 December has always been so, at least for the past 24 years in Hong Kong. On the day that I was born, it's a little bit chilly, but the weather was wonderful. And then I've observed a weather pattern of my birthday - it's always bright and sunny, and a little bit chilly, just like the very day that I was born.

情亦然

班上，有一位女孩子，她的名字，叫情亦然。

漂亮的十五歲，慧黠的眼睛，清秀的臉孔，烏黑的短髮，束著小馬尾，坐在課室近門口第一排的最後。講課的時候，她總是右手拿著筆，抬起頭，眼睛一直看著我，等待我以目光相投。

她用黑色的墨水筆寫字，字裡行間，有一種不妥協的方向。跟班上其他女孩子一樣，她善良，純真，但她的眼神有一種堅定，她的個性多了一份讓人銘記的鮮明感。

我相信香港沒有第二個女孩子，有同樣的名字。情亦然。真實的寫法與此不同（不然未免太浪漫了），但屬同音字，唸起上來，不錯是情亦然。

天下間所有故事，不都由一情字為始？